I couldn’t possibly fit in everything but I picked out a few select gems:
I think my girl crush on Carrie Fisher has sadly come to an end. Don’t get me wrong, it’s been quite a ride. Seeing her somewhere between one and ten times in Wishful Drinking on Broadway was definitely the highlight of last winter in NYC. Each time I walked out of the theatre my cheeks hurt from laughing so hard. And she has definitely been inspirational in getting my writing off the ground. How she is able to turn a tragedy into a comedy is truly a gift. And one day Carrie I will actually think my dad’s murder conviction is hilarious.
I do like to think that we have some similarities which are some but not limited to:
She’s from Los Angeles, I’m from Los Angeles
She owned a parrot, I owned a parrot (RIP Huey del Fuego)
She worked for George Lucas, I worked for George Lucas
She can tap dance, I can tap dance
She’s a writer, I’m (now) a writer!
Carrie definitely recognized me when I became a regular at her show, and to this I have to say, “I swear, it’s not my fault I met someone at the theatre that could get me front row seats!” But I also bank on the fact that she gets ECT’s (electro-convulsive therapy) which wipes the mind of your short-term memory. So Carrie, I have this to say to you, if you keep recognizing me I call bullshit on those ECT’s! Come on!
So back in the day when I worked at LucasArts, they asked me to be the model for the game Rebel Assault II, because they didn’t want to pay the game actress for the shoot. I almost fainted. I went to Skywalker Ranch, which I had been to many times. But this time I was able to check out the archive building, where all the props, costumes, etc. were kept from George Lucas’ little film projects. My eyes popped open as I walked between rows and rows of costumes from Indiana Jones, Radioland Murders, Howard The Duck, Star Wars, Empire and Jedi. I touched the white dress that Karen Allen wore in Raiders, when she drank Belloq under the table and pulled a knife on him. Man was she tiny because I wouldn’t be able to get one ass cheek in that thing.
They suited me up in the same camouflage outfit that Carrie Fisher and Mark Hamill wore on the moon of Endor in Return of the Jedi. I wasn’t sure if it was the exact one, so I just imagined it was. Actually now that I think about it Carrie is tiny too so her pants would have been board shorts on me. After I was suited up, they put me on the speeder bike and I had to pretend I was being chased by stormtroopers. This couldn’t get any better!
Here’s a photo from the shoot:
Here is the final box cover:
And here’s a little something my designer Jimmy did for fun: